In the old days, at the time of knights and brave warriors, great things were done for the sake of happiness and for being with beloved partners together. Young hearts used challenged the wishes of relatives and the demands of society. For the sake of happiness, and desire to be together, they renounced titles, wealth, inheritances, and other privileges. Nowadays, being together, being a husband and wife is also a feat for many. However, the feat is not in the struggle against society and its conventions but in the struggle against oneself.
Nowadays, marriages are out of fashion, and it happened because of many reasons. A few of us know how to make long-distance relationships work, plus our society more and more actively promotes freedom of love. Of course, in this article, we don’t cover those situations when people had a terrible experience in relations, because this is a very different question. Also, we avoid cases, where it is impossible to resolve the situation due to conflicting circumstances (different countries, religion, difficult living conditions), or lack of feelings. Plus, things are very different in long-distance relations, because it is pretty hard to make long-distance relationships work. Here we are talking about people who don’t have previous experience of married life or external barriers. Instead, we will discuss those who still, for some reason, are afraid of marriage.
- 1. Lack of freedom or complete freedom of choice
As you know, in earlier times, marriage was a more economical and political aspect of life. The tragedy was that people who loved each other could not be together if their union was not beneficial to the financial situation or nobility of the clan. This is why there are so many songs, legends, and fairy tales about such relations. Nowadays, things have changed, but young people still not fully understand that marriage is a good thing. If earlier fear or doubts about marriage were blocked by a stronger fear, which was the fear of becoming an outcast of society, today, people believe that marriage will somehow limit their freedom.
- Lack of information or an abundance of information
In recent years, young couples often had no idea what will follow after their marriage, and they only knew that they had to marry. After the marriage, they had to deal with many problems that they could have never imagine before. No doubts, it was very stressful and terrifying. But, nowadays, we have a different problem. Long before getting married, young people learn about possible problems in marriage, and they fear them not understanding that they may never face those problems in reality.
- Enjoyment, or why repair something that already works?
The formation of a couple can be compared with the development of a child. At first, everything happens at the level of natural processes and innate reflexes. In the future, the child is already independently learning, acquiring new qualities and skills, developing, and growing up. This will always be the case, since changes are constantly taking place in us (and the world around us doesn’t stand still), and we can’t survive in it without efforts on our part.
The same thing happens in a relationship. The romantic period is the period of pleasure and the very first stage at which all processes occur at the level of “chemistry,” and sometimes we cannot explain our feelings. When, without actually making any effort, people feel completely happy and delightful. But in the future, both partners will have to pay some effort to be happy.
The whole world in our era is committed to enjoyment, but it is not always possible to enjoy living together with someone, so we are afraid to change anything and become closer to other people by officially announcing our relationships.